Jamie
~
"hey daddy, i wanna go home"


Lucas
~"
we do get along, he is my brother, but like i said..it was Haley and me first." i sigh "i was always very protective of her, and i honestly don`t know how they got so close, i mean, when Haley was gone Nathan was a wreck, Brooke moved in to hep him and Jamie and then..it just hapenned."

--------------------

Brooke: i knew it was Jamie on the phone so i sat and waited to see what was up

Nathan----"Hey buddy....well uncle Skills wants you to stay over with him tonight. I thought that you wanted to do that. Is some thing wrong?"

Julian----""Thanks for telling me what you know man."

Lucas
~
'Yeah, no problem, i am just glad you are taking care of her, she is very special"

Jamie
~
"I wanna go home! I miss my bed"

Brooke: i loved Jamie with all my heart but i really wanted to spend time with Nathan but i knew he was not going to now

Nathan---"Jamie...I will come get you." I say bye to my son and look at Brooke "I am sorry. He has gotten where he wants to be at home so much lately."

Julian----"Yeah....well I will see you in a few at that restaurant."

Jamie
~
"Thanks" i hang up, i didnt want daddy to be alone, especially after i saw her and aunt Brooke kissing.

Lucas
~~~~~~
"see ya man"

Brooke:" no it is ok i understand " i was upset but i knew he needed to be with Jamie

Nathan----"I have no idea what or how I am supposed to tell him about Haley. I do not want to hurt him and I know if I say hey buddy your momma is here but she does not remember you or me or any thing that has happened it will kill him. I know I have to tell him though. He will be hurt when he finds out she is here and that I did not tell him."

Brooke:" yeah i think you shoudl tell him he is stmart he is alot smarter then we give him crestid for so i but he will understand better then yout hink"

Nathan---"Brooke...we can still have dinner together. I will pick him up and we can go some where and eat."

Julian---I leave and go to where Joy is, she seems really down. "Bad day?"

Brooke:" you want me to have dinner with you and Jamie? i could love that nathan"

Joy
~
I stay in the rain for a while then i decide to leave or i will get sick. I go back to the hotel and i am so beat, i take off my wet shirt then put a dry one then i look at the door opening, he walks in and i sigh "yeah..you could say that" I look at him then run my hand thru my wet hair "i feel like i am a disapointment to everyone"

Nathan---"I would Brooke...very much. Jamie loves you he is just upset right now."


Julian---"Do not think that Joy. That is so far from the truth. I was just with Luke as you know and he loves you and cares about you so much. You are getting your memory back slowly and in time you will forget about all of this...and you will forget about me." I say this quietly.

Joy
~
"What??? Julian, i will never forget about you, you are the only person who doesnt push me to be someone i am not, you always give me time, you are patient, and honest and just amazing, even if i remember who i wa.s..i will never forget you, i promise"

Julian----"I know it is too much to expect us to stay together now. You love Nathan and from every thing I have heard it seems like you belong with him."

Joy
~
"He´s with someone else Julian, he slpet with someone after i came, what kinda a person does that to the woman he loves!! You would never do that"

Julian---"I do not know. I have done a lot of bad things in my life Joy. You still love him...I know you do.'

Joy
~
"I don`t even remember him..you might had done some bads things Julian but i know in my heart that you would never hurt me like Nathan did"

Julian----"No but I have hurt other people. Ask Peyton about what a jerk I can be. Nathan thought you were gone Joy so for your son and for himself he went on. I do not think Brooke or Nathan ever meant to or wanted to hurt you. I..I want so much to make love to you but I don't/ I am not sure if you love me like that or if what you feel for me is more like friends."

Joy
~~~~~~
"when i kiss you..i know what i feel for you it is definetly not a friendship, he slpet with her after i got back Julian, he knew i was back and he still slept with her, there is not excuse of that, i know you would never hurt me" i say as i walk over him and look into his eyes "i know that" i whisper then start kissing him.

Brooke:" well then what are we waiting for lets go get him now" i was so happy he wanted me to be with him and Jamie

Julian----She starts kissing me and things get pretty intense. She starts unbuttoning my shirt when I stop her. "Joy this is not right. When we do this I want it to be because you love me as much as I love you. Not because you are hurting over some other guy."

Nathan----"You look really sexy right now."

Joy
~~~
"Just please..just don`t talk now Julian..don`t talk...." i whisper softly as i look into his eyes and kiss him again.


James
~
I get my things and wait for daddy.

Brooke:" well this i know but we can not do that right now we have to go get Jamie come on he will be waiting on us "

Julian----"We cant Joy. You are married to Nathan. I promised myself when I was really young I was never going to be like my dad. I was never going to be with some one who is married. It broke my mom's heart."


Nathan----"I wanted you to know in case I do not get to tell you later."

Brooke: i smile " nathan ..... i love you " i could barly breath after telling him that

Joy
~
"Damn it!!!" i say as i pull away. "what about my heart, huh??? Nathan broke it and i need to fic it and you don`t care!!"

Nathan----"I love you too Brooke." I do love her but I also love Haley. This is so complicated and I do not want any one being hurt.

Julian---"Having sex with me will not fix this Joy. It wont. It will just make things harder on you. The reason I am saying this is because I do care about you. If I did not care than I would take advantage of you. I want you so much but not until you get things worked out with him."

Haley
~
"Fine", even though he is right i am mad, mostly because of Nathan, he can have all the sex he wants and not care and i can`t!

Julian-----"Joy do not be mad...I am not doing this to upset you. God if I did not love you than right now would be the perfect time to just do what I want to. I might not ever get a chance to be with you like this. Nate and you are this perfect couple and the two of you will work things out. I know you do not think so right now but you will."

Joy
~
"Perfect couple???? Are you seroius??? IS he here Julian??? NO! He is not, he is probably be with that Brooke again, he doesn`t want me, no one does!"

Julian---"What? what? Is that what you really believe that I do not want you? That is such crap and you know it. I have taken so many freezing cold showers because of you and trying to be the kind of man you deserve. I have no idea what Nathan Scott is doing right now and I do not give a damn. I know you do though. I know you want him to be here beside you right now not me."

Joy
~
"He`s probably doing Briooke" i sigh and get tears in my eyes "God what is happenning to me!!! This isn`t me, this person with hate and resent inside her, i don`t like this person at all, i hate being like this, ever since i got in this stupid town i have been feeling nothing but angry, frutrated and crappy!"

Julian---"I know baby and I am sorry." I put my arms around her. "Joy if I thought this was the answer...us being together like that...I would do it. I really believe now that I will never get to show you how much I love you. Not in that way. I know you though and I know it would just make you feel guilty and dirty. Luke told me today that Nate and you got married so young and one of the reasons why is because you did not want to have sex with out being married first."

Joy
~
"how can he sleep with someone els eand not feel guilty and dirty???? How can guys just break girls hearts daily and then say they love us??? I..I was a virgin???" he nod "so i..i gave myself to him and he still..God what kinda of person does that!!" i get angrier.

Julian----"Luke told me that Nate was a big time player until he met you. That you changed him and Luke wrote about some of that in his book. Nate fell huge for you and you were the best influence on him ever. I think he might be hurting really bad right now and Brooke is there. Guys can have sex with out having emotions in it. I do not know why but we can. Luke also told me that Nate loves you and that this past months have been hell for him. I am not trying to defend him I am just saying he has it really rough also."

joy
~~~~~~~
"he told me he...he fell for her, so aparently it wasn`t jsut about sex, hurting is not an excuse for have sex with someone else Julian, we took vows, he should known better than just jump in bed and break those vows i can`t even look at him, and i don`t remember him!" i sigh "Ma-maybe i should ask for divorce so he can be a free man"

Julian---"You love him..I know you do. You feel things when he is close to you that you do not feel for me. I am not going to make excuses for him. I am not going to tell you why you should be with him because I do not want you to be. All I know is your heart still is with him."

Joy
~
"How can that be when i don`t even remeber him JUlian??? Especially after he hurt me so much"

Julian---"I do not know. Your heart remembers him though. You can not tell me that I am wrong. You love me but it is not the same thing you feel for him. That is what Nathan has for this Brooke girl also. Like I said I am not going to defend him because I want to kick his ass for making you love him so damn much."

Joy
~~~
"he said he fell for her, that is a strong feeling Julian, to fall in love for someone it is not something easy, not when it is real, you know the real thing.., and a part of me doesnt want to remember him, just want to forget it so i can stop feeling this way..it is horrible."

Julian----"How do you feel about me Joy?"

Joy
~~~
"I...I`m not sure.." i swallow then look down because i knew this was hurting him and it was hurting me also "I know that what I feel for you it is not only friendship, when we kiss i like it, i feel safe and loved and even wanted, I like the way i feel when i am with you, i feel relaxed, you give me peace, Nathan gives me a mix of feelings and most of them hurt me, I am just really confused right now and I hate it..I..I wished i had a better answer for you"

Brooke:" well i am glad to hear you say that i was starting to get nervis ..."

Julian----"Your heart races when you are around him. You have kissed him and I saw the way you two look at each other. No one can compete with that. Not Brooke...not me...no one. I am sad and hurt for me but I am happy because you found out who you are and that is what you have been searching for."

Nathan----"How did those design people like your sketches Brooke? Are you going to put the guys clothes in your line?" I know if I can get her to talk about work maybe she will. I can not tell her what is happening between me and her or me and Haley cause I really do not know.

Joy
~
"I..I didn`t find out who I am Julian, I don`t remmber anything about Haley, i have some stupid flashbacks but they make me even more confused" i sigh "i..i know i used to sing, that is why i always loved to play on your piano"

Julian----"You have the basis to start finding out who you are now. I...I do not know how to help you Joy to get your memories back. I wish I did."

Joy
~
"I know you wish you could help Julian, i guess no one can help me, but you told me you made an apoitment to this doctor so maybe she can help me to remeber or something, i was thi nking about maybe trying to record again, i listened to some songs i wrote and song and...it felt strange, some of them i knew the lyrics even if i don`t know when or how i wrote them, maybe i should try to get back on music, it might help to find myself again since i think it is a huge part o f who i was..."

Brooke:" oh yeah they siad they were great and i was hoping to get the line going so i can finaly stop working at the cafe"

Julian----"I think that would be a good thing for you. You have a great voice and I kind of figured you were in music some how."

Nathan----"You have been away from what you love doing long enough. I know you put your career on hold for Jamie and me and I will never forget that you did."